Idea to Revolution!!!

Idea to Revolution

"The revolution is not an apple that falls when it is ripe. You have to make it fall." 

-Che Guevara

Its true revolution comes when the people bring it, when they need it, when they crave for it, a revolution always comes. But when it will come here in my country? It’s a valid question as we all can see how much ready we are for that, we need a new beginning a new confidence a new energy, as all we left with is corruption, lies, dirty politics, greed, violence and a very low life standard for a huge part of people. The powerful people just working to be more powerful rich by exploiting common mass and becoming disgustingly rich, while the poor is crossing every limit of poverty, we all can feel a tingling feeling that a black plague  is surrounding us, corrupting our roots morality but we don’t have any voice left. The instinct of being alive, to just exist somehow making us weak, and we are losing our voice along the way.

Just being alive, getting a settle life with food on our plates, is enough for a common man, living is a struggle everyday; as we leave our home behind we leave safety we leave a secure feeling all we have is fear of being dead by an accident or a shooting gone wrong, the animals wearing the mask of a human is all around us they are growing by passing moment as the humanity dies silently on a side of a road by hunger. What it is that happening? We all can see but keeping our mouth shut, we are all becoming a part of a falling society. Where education becomes a field of business teachers acts like salesman when students act like masters of an educational institution what that create? What can it create? It creates this, this situation we all are living here, where cheating is a means of survival, disloyalty, and corruption is a real way of living then who will bring the revolution? The people? Which one? The group, that only knows violence and exploitation? Or the oppress group who don’t even have luxury to live properly securely? An Idea needs a strong mind to grow a nourished mind with clarity can bring an idea to life and an Idea, only an Idea can start a revolution.

Now question is not that, when we are going to bring our revolution a new beginning? but  it’s about who, which mind and when it will going to create an Idea that will grow like a jungle fire and bring a wanted needed revolution? No one knows that, even its not clear that we are in the proper time to witness a revolution, may be it will come after us, may be never, but first we need a voice, we need to strengthen our mind, first we need to dream about a new beginning only then in someone, somewhere will born an magnificent idea which will change our life forever. 

Finally she came !!

Finally she came

Finally she came; of course it’s a she, what else it can be? All good things are a she isn’t it? The first language that we talk for the first time is mother language, the country in which we born is motherland, the nature that nourishes us & we destroying that apparently is also known as mother nature it’s all her, a women, a symbol of creation, symbol of internal power so why will it be any different so finally she came.

It was a hot day scorching in the daylight, the trees were grey and sad, the child from my neighborhood had a very bad mood, her little thin body was no match for the powerful voice that she possess and days like this can make it far more worst. In short it was a very bad hot day, and all the people facing that was having a bad mood all day. It was like the political atmosphere of my state, warm and unstable, all bad moody and dangerous, the day was like the life of today’s middle class men struggling low achieving life with an annoyed humor no brightness in it. There was wind, I mean day was quite windy but just to make it worse, the heat made the wind excruciating. Though all this happening still the people were busy in their day to day business, just feeling the terrible unbearable whether silently. Why would the express the pain it was not in their hand to change the nature, the ages of human action may have something to do with it but a single man in a fix time cannot do anything to change it what else could he don apart from suffering so it was silently passing a day a very hot and bad day.

Finally she came, every eye suddenly was staring in the sky where a patch of a little black cloud was growing slowly covering the rest of the sky, the sunlight was going weaker by the second, the wind was turning little bit bearable, all silent mind doing their jobs feeling the change but not saying anything or expressing anything, but still moods were changing. The clouds became stronger and stronger the winds were getting harsh from pleasant the day was becoming dark and finally one drop of shining water kissed the ground followed by millions of them, the dry soil was clammy in seconds the trees where brighter and greener the moods were changing but no one had time to rejoice but doing the jobs but may be not everyone some of them welcomed her welcomed the joyful calming rain into their hearts feeling the raindrops in the face they welcomed her.

This was the day like any other day when rain came and the day became nice and cold the mood of my neighborhood child was pleasant her voice seemed happy, I felt saved but still the uncertainty of the next day what the weather will be but for that day it was a surprise gift from nature and end of the day when all jobs were done everyone enjoyed the cool breeze, a happy ending for that day.

rain rocks!!

life is nice!!

Scenes around me!!!

just saying!!!

A belief or just an idea??

I can’t say that I am a believer, I don’t believe in stuff that I never witnessed directly, but I am not a nonbeliever either, it’s a mix feeling that I have. I just logically can’t believe anything without proper reason, for me being a believer and being a completely skeptic is a weakness for anyone. What I feel is a lot of question in my mind loads of what ifs, its kind of funny though when I was little I believed every fairy tale my grandma told me, I had faith more like blind faith or it was pure love towards my mamma (I called my grandma that) never questioned her it was her soothing loving voice that I believed. Now it’s completely different I don’t even think of believing anything just by hearing it, I ask a huge amount of question to myself and to others, never believed in miracles or anything supernatural in my life, because never witness anything weird.

I heard many stories from many people about supernatural stuff, I live in India & I guess it’s natural for me to hearing all miracle stories, the people who told me those stories strangely believed in those things in real for them that was true. What makes a thing true in a mind of a person? Just belief is enough to consol the mind? What about Ideas that sounds logical an idea can be change or modify a belief can’t its like living in a box forever. An Idea can grow evolve and free from prejudices, an idea is like a fresh wind. I can’t say I am skeptic completely but close enough; I just want to keep an open mind for all things all possibilities but it is very hard to believe in something that does not make sense in my head & that is why I cannot get how a person believe in such thing that I find stupid. I want to understand the mind of other people and how that works differently for each one of them, it is like a completely different puzzle, the mind of a person is very close to a miracle but within reason of course. If someone believes with all of his heart that something is true it can also completely unbelievable for another person, that makes no sense generally but somehow mind can make sense for its master.

My mind will always be doubtful, I don’t completely trust anyone or anything its complicated cause I think blind faith or complete trust can make vision of a person very indistinct hazy, it can hide a real truth behind the mask of a good disguise, in this life in this society we lie constantly even in small matters we present ourselves to other according to the need of that particular situation, it’s like a stage act  perfect polite and planned, we do plan our every move like a chess board, life is like a chess board I think, and we all thing plan but some just plan better. It is interesting if I believe something it will make sense to me but if I have an idea it will not only help me understand but also it will grow and will be modified with new information, for me an idea is much better than a fix belief.

love is it???

Love Actually!!

Love is an incredibly known word in our life, we search for love respect love, want love neglect love or even sometime just lost faith in love. But the question stands what is love actually? Or more, does love really exist? May be, but it is very rare or commonly mixed up with other emotions? What is it actually? Is it like a chick flick movie or a sweet dog movie? It is sounding weird right? Like how I am comparing chick flick love with a dog movie love? It is strange, but both are love in different forms isn’t it? It is only a unique emotion that is actually infinite but still very rare.

The love of parents towards their children is very common, we believe in that kind of love but still when we find an innocent child in a road side or in a dustbin we wonder is the love real? how can a mother throw her own like that, even in animal world, where everything is still wild and dangerous the mother protects their cub viciously, it is their natural instinct but why the human natural instinct is so much fuzzy, why society and other outer things control the internal natural feelings natural love.  So what? Do our logical mind clouding our real feelings?

Where is love, around the corner? Is it in a smile? Or just sparking with first eye contact? May be but how does it work? We can like someone then try to change them slowly and try constantly to be in love, but sometime just all fades away suddenly we start to like someone else but think we are still in love, now in both time is it really love or just  liking all along? May be but sometimes someone just like someone after knowing the other person and like as they are in real and like to live a life together grow old, yesterday I saw a really happy couple they were 80 or something but still very fond of each other holding hands, it was very sweet to see real connection, may be that is love just around the corner.

One day I met a strange person living in the streets most of the time, sharing his food with street dogs and birds, in hot afternoons just rest beside a tree and start talking to it, everyone assumed that he might be little crazy, I asked him once ‘why you talk to the trees?’ He smiled and told me that the trees standing all of their life to give us shade, cold winds shelter oxygen but they are so alone, they grow faster if someone just talks to them. I did not investigate the truth about his words scientifically but felt a love a love of nature around us the silent love without anything in return, around us, nourishing us can they really feel love or just we should feel loving all the time cause whatever love is it can be common and in every heart or just rare and very hard to find still somehow sometime we all feel loved just being alive that is. It is only thing that is infinite we can love as many souls we can still never ends still we just use it very little and made this emotion truly very rare.

Story of a Mad Man!!!!

Story of a Mad Man

Once upon a time there was a Mad Man, wondering across the world with weird smile on his face, singing dancing as he wanted, mocking the silent walkers along the way who were passing him like a ghost parade. He was a person that can be easily amused by a piece of shiny metal or a sweet butterfly or a singing bird on a tree twig, he did not know that everyone called him a Mad Man on his back, even he would not care if someone call him a Mad Man on his face, he was just happy to be known somehow, the acknowledgment assure him that he really exist in this glorious world, with so much to see so much to know so much stupid little things to do, it’s like a constant dream with millions of color, every passing face is a new one a different one so much multiplicity in every corner really interesting.

Once upon a time there were some Sane Men living a sane life marching according to the rules they once set, despaired hated a Man, a annoyingly happy man, singing and dancing without any reason, the man with dreamy shining eyes and a face weirdly different from others with a smile most of the time, the band of sane men called him a Mad Man behind his back, even some of them called him directly that way but the Mad Man just smiled and nodded his head and keep on doing his weird wondering, what was he looking for? Why he was so damn happy all the time? And how can he do those stupid things without getting something in return? He was a man of many questions, and the answers were to blurry for the Sane Men to understand, so they hated him, disgusted by him whenever in the road that man passed right through them they felt awful, alarming, strange, uncanny it was like a life without any rules without any plans just a happy life, it was a abomination.

Once upon a time there was a happy land with lots of admirers, all happy shining faces, enjoying the blue sky with the patches of clouds running around, deep starry nights with the sound of crickets and some night creatures, raining was a joyful event in that land, the land was so happy the trees were more green than now, all things were imperfect wild and happy no rules no plans no cruelty. But suddenly all thing started to change, there people were starting to change in a living breathing programmed life forms, nothing they did without reason or never they smiled without a cause behind. The land became gloomy, the trees started to lost their colors, all the creatures of night became quite, somehow the people just covered the starry nights, all little stupid things were gone, but there still was a man like his elders living a happy joyful life, doing stupid things, but he was all alone, every one called him the Mad Man hated him, but he loved everyone everything around him but that made him vulnerable, defenseless against all the schemes of reasonable men around him he was a threat   to their world so they conspired against him. One day he just vanished land became more sad, the only Mad Man was no more in the land those Sane Men smiled at each other, their smiling faces sickened the land, the land get the point, somehow all that is left behind did not deserve the Mad Man so it was obvious that he disappeared, a land without a Mad Man in it is a lifeless patch of soil nothing more than that.

Independence!!!!

The dream of Independence!!!!

Every independence day I get a mix feeling in my heart, am I proud or am I overly happy or am I little bit of both or just nothing at all or just numb?What should I feel then? 65 years ago we became the citizens of a free country, we earned or they gave us the right to rule our own country, since then we the Indians are shaping the character of our country and now by that journey which started from 1947 we are here 2012 in this India, this is what we achieved in 65 years. So have we done justice with our country in those 65 years?  May be yes this was what the freedom fighters, the youth of our past sacrificed their life for, or may be not! What was India they dreamt once? Why they gave their lives? For today’s India, for our freedom from the clutches of tyranny, oppression, torture, injustice for our existence and pride they just died every drop of blood from those brave souls still fresh in our soil, in our country’s heart.

The sacrifices once made for us for our beautiful country, for the pride, for the justice, help the sun rise everyday as a red ball of fire representing the dream of one prosperous country, they died smiling. They were smiling because they were dreaming about a country rising from the ashes of despair, slavery, oppression and becoming glorious and strong and solid by day. We shaped our country in those 65 years they were looking at us. The eyes of those great brave souls; who gave up their precious life to protect their motherland’s honor, dignity is still watching us. Now what bothers me every independence day is  that, do we make them proud? Are they still smiling? How should I feel tell me anyone please! proud happy or just numb!!!

Crazy Talk!!!

Dream in a ……dream

It’s all a dream in a dream or its all nightmare in a nightmare I don’t know; depends on the subconscious mind of an unconscious person!! True enough, how a mad man would feel surrounded by all sane men? Or a sane man in a crazy world, strangely we all somehow know those feelings, or may be just I do sometimes, when I find all the people around me totally mad and sometimes it’s me acting like a crazy person. I always find it funny how the majority of people decide who’s who? I mean when a guy can be known as a mad man? What is the definition of sanity or insanity?  I am talking about day to day sanity or insanity not about the pure psychotic or crazy cases just normal day to day crazy.  

I mean what is wrong if I sing in a middle of a road if I am happy, all the classic movie characters do, so why I can’t in real life? Just enjoy the rain in my rooftop sometime shouting in joy, it is fun for some of us, just feel it but can’t really do those things it will be mad things to do. This is really sad not be able to do little funny sweet things which our heart wants, those little drops of joy is so far away from a common sane person. If it is all a dream then how come I can’t dream a dream of my dreams? Sounds crazy does not it? The power not in our hands really we are just playing along with all the rules codes and little stupid things, just not living in a full glory of this excellent life with this kind of a brain all busy in doing common possible things what a waste. Not able to do extraordinary glorious work with our mind is a nightmare living in a prison not using full potential is really a nightmare. Or is it???

হারিয়ে যাওয়া বুলি

হারিয়ে যাওয়া বুলি

 মাতৃভাষা, শিশু প্রথম মনের কথা জানায় তার মা কে,মাতৃভাষা প্রথম আনন্দের বহিঃপ্রকাশ, প্রথম প্রথম জীবনের সাথে পরিচয়।তবু বড় হওয়ার সাথে সাথে সেই মাতৃভাষার সাথে কোথায় যেন ধীরে ধীরে সম্পর্ক ছিঁড়তে থাকে।সবার হয়তো হয়না তবে রাজনীতি, অর্থনীতি কিছু মাতৃভাষাকে তার নিজের সন্তানদের কাছেই গুরুত্বহীন করে দেয়।যেমনটা ঘটছে আমার মাতৃভাষার সাথে, বাংলাভষা কত মিষ্টি ভাষা এই বাংলা,এই ভাষায় মা ডাকতে কতই না ভালো লাগে, বার বার বাবা ডাকতে ভালো লাগে, আমার প্রথম রূপকথা ছিল এই বাংলায়, প্রথম শেখা ছড়া ছিল বাংলায়। কিন্তু আজ আমার শিক্ষাগত যোগ্যতা প্রাথমিকভাবে নির্ভর করে আমি কেমন আন্তর্জাতিক ভাষায় পারদর্শী তার ওপর, আমি আমার মাতৃভাষায় নির্ভুল ভাবে বলতে না পারলেও যদি অনর্গল বিদেশী ভাষা আওড়াতে পারি তবেই আমি ভিষণ ভাবে শিক্ষিত।সবাই নিজেকে বাংলা ভোলানোর ইদুরদৌড়ে জুটে গেছে, নিজের ভাষাই শিক্ষা এখন কাম্য নয় কিই বা হবে ভালোকরে বাংলা বলে? কিই বা আছে এই ভাষায়? এমন অবস্থা যে বাংলা সাহিত্যের সেই বিশাল বৈচিত্রময় ভান্ডার থেকে অনেকেই বঞ্চিত করে রেখেছে নিজেকে, অজান্তেই বা জেনে বুঝে।

একদিন এক বাবুর সাথে কথা হল, বোধকরি তিনি জন্মগত ভাবে বাঙালী কিন্ত তা মানতে বড়ই লজ্জা তার,আমার মত এক নিতান্ত বাঙালী মেয়ের সাথে শুধুই বিদেশী ভাষাতেই কথা বলে গেলেন আর কথপোকথনের শেষে আমার শিক্ষার হাল দেখে হয়তো বড়ই ব্যাথা পেলেন, কারণ আমি এক বাঙালীর সাথে বাংলা ছাড়া অন্য কোনো ভাষায় কথা বলার কোনো প্রয়োজন কখন বোধ করিনি, তবে যে হারে বাংলা ভোলানোর খেলা চলছে তাতে আমাকেও হয়তো আমার এই পিছিয়ে পড়া অভ্যেসটিকে পাল্টাতে হবে।

ভাষা কথপোকথন, যোগাযোগের প্রাথমিক চাহিদা, হাজার হাজার বছরের মানবসভ্যতা সাক্ষী হয়ে আছে বহু ভাষার বিকাশ ও বিবর্তনের,বহু পরিবর্তন হয়েছে, এক ভাষা থেকেও অনেক ভাষার জন্ম হয়েছে, আবার অনেক ভাষা সময় ভুলিয়ে দিয়েছে।আমার মাতৃভাষাও হয়তো একদিন সময়ে হারিয়ে যাবে সাথে হারিয়ে যাবে আমার পড়া প্রথম রূপকথা 'নীলকমল' 'লালকমল', সেই রাক্ষস খোক্ষস, সেই মরণকাঠি জীয়ন কাঠি আমার কৈশরে পড়া বম্কিম চন্দ্র চট্টোপাধয়ায়ের 'রাজসিংহ' 'আনন্দমঠ' কপালকুন্ডলা সব।সামনে খেলতে থাকা কোনো শিশুর মুখে যখন ভাঙ্গা বাংলা আর ঝকঝকে বেদেশী বুলি শুনি তখনি মনে আবছা হয়ে যায় আমার জীবনের প্রথম শেখা বুলি....

Psych....

Psych!!!!

Mind is a very powerful thing, everything we do, as we act or react depends on our mind; how we think, how we see an event influences us, makes us what we are. It’s a dangerous thing also a twisted mind can fabricate very dark action, we just do what our mind dictates us, so keeping it sane is a very important job for all of us. A single trauma a misunderstanding a blow in mind can shatter us like a sandcastle in a beach without even our acknowledgment. It is very scary actually, sometime seeing other people around me act in different ways thinking dissimilar manner  makes me wonder what I m thinking how much distinct that may be from other minds? Thinking in a same manner for two different people is not very common but also not rare; it’s like a mind puzzle happening all around us. We all argue about same events or things but with a separate outlook, always want to make the other person think the same way but is it up to us??? I don’t think so similar minded people can be influenced but a person with a totally different mindset understanding my point of view is an impossible task.

We all think that we are accurate, what we are doing is the right thing to do, we judge someone according to our prospect, but that is not very suitable or smart thing to do, making someone think like you, first needs a clear understanding of that person’s unique thinking pattern, everyone act slightly different than other, sometime it’s the pattern that decides what kind of person we are. When a criminal commits a crime we all think that how anyone is capable of doing such thing? It’s totally wrong, but in the mind of that criminal all of that somehow making sense, and it’s not wrong for that person, that is what we can call a twisted mind with dark outcome. We sometime behave in a same approach with everyone but how can we do that everyone is different and can also react in a totally shocking way, that is how sometimes we trigger something evil in a mind of someone with a confusing mind and those thing can ended in drastic results without even knowing it .

So it is very much important to first ensure the mindset of the person you are going to interact with, just read the obvious signs of human behavior and then act according to that, it’s a thing of practice understanding a person is very complicated if we do as we think, but thinking like another person makes everything a little bit simple for anyone without triggering any bad outcome.

Life as it is!!!

Life as it is

What we actually need and what we usually get is little bit of a complicated equation, what we think we need is not important, what we do after getting something totally opposite is the main theme. Yes theme of life, the rushing, surprising adventure novel in which we all are in a different chapter as the main character, we all are the center character of our own life novel, and this thinking is really fascinating isn’t it?? Me running around in a novel as confused as struggling as a fictional character do, not knowing the next twist ahead waiting for something to happen and then react.

Now what kind of novel we want? The genre, which should it be?? A comedy? A thriller? A drama or just a boring stack of words, all depends on the choice we make along the way of living what we want to remember in our last moment of life? The speedy flashback in memory lane would it thrill us or just bore us to death, something to think about. We all have our own favorite writers, genres of story or novel, a different style a different approach only which our own unique mind can appreciate.

Just like that the story of my own childhood, a chapter full of mystery magic adventure; cause for a child everything is magical, mysterious and new. A child explores everything, all new feelings, colors, events meanings, new friends new experiences all fresh and colorful no tragedy no grief only ecstasy bliss pleasure all around. So every step towards age and end of life a new chapter just keep on writing itself with so many new persona and qualities, the chapters of our life contains many genres not one color can define the story of life it’s not only bright orange or deepest blue, not only gray or black not purple or white there are many different shades that makes our life.

       l l l l

Inner darkness....

Dark!!!!!

Dark is light in disguise, everything is same; but still we all afraid of darkness, its natural for us, its feels like something unknown hiding in the dark, waiting, lurking around. Why is it so?? the same atmosphere is around us becomes mysterious and scary in the absence of the light, its kinda funny also, the fear of seeing nothing makes our skin cold. But night is so soft and easy, feels cozy with the stars sprinkling in the dark sky.

Why we are so easily get scared by darkness?? why we so much think about it and afraid of it? I think we are not so much afraid of the outer darkness but the inner darkness lurking about in the corners of our minds, we miss to spot them, we look for them but hide them from our consciousness the ancient wild feeling the instinct of dark and mystery all in our mind living with us from the dawn of our existence, the feeling of the first fire fighting with the obvious darkness around us, the waiting of the black fog around that fire the struggling of the first human beings to continue the light roaring in a fiery sound, all of those moments still lives with us, we all are afraid of the obvious darkness and still fighting to light that first fire to keep that darkness out, this constant struggle makes us vulnerable to the darkness within us. 

Nothing creative can come out from denial first we have to accept the ancient darkness within us then accept all around us in light or in its complete absence, then look for other feeling scatter around, then the dark becomes a resting place, nothing scary just a calm cozy situation for mind to rest just like night beautiful soft exciting with little sparkling stars all up in the dark sky helping us to feel comfortable like our ancestors before the first fire.   

   

Am I angry???? nooooooo!!!!!

Dead Inside!!!

What we know,  what we usually understand, what we think as a identity is very simple but what if, what we believe and what we actually do is completely opposite!! then what?? exactly this much confusing things we do everyday or better to say we don't do anything actually. Yes it is mad why would it be anything else than mad??? do we like to be slave? do we like to live as pet? we don't. But are we really don't act like slave or a pet?? This is the question we just don't ask ourselves, do we? We live in a democratic country we are the citizens the maker of the government, and what is a government?? a main part of a machinery known as a country our country, we choose our representatives to be the part of a running government, its their duty to run the country keep the citizens alive with a good reasonable living standard, but do they really take care of all of us? lets think!!! ohh I forgot again we don't think anymore we just live like we don't even mean it, we just live our life on faith nothing else matters, the future generation is dying without proper medical help its faith, the education system is corrupt head to toe its all faith nothing we can do, we just hope that the people that we chose to run our life will be kind enough to give us something to live, but that not makes us pets. 

We deserve, we need every basic things important for living but we don't get that and we don't care, because we can live with nothing, we are after all really strong we can survive any thing and be happy, we are not angry we are not frustrated  we are calm and cold, and the leaders that we chose we made we are their makers treats us like nothing, little insects slaves still we are happy to receive some bones here and there, our main part of the machinery just working for its own sake the whole machine is crumbling we are suffocation but still not angry just living the life gathering money. some of us just forgot what a real Road looks like where the life runs smoothly without any obstacle or holes here and there we can't even imagine the life without corruption, without bad human aid services, bad transportation we like to live in a risky life where we don't know if we leave the home to go somewhere and will we even reach the destination or just be a cold dead body beside a broken road, we love the risk don't we?? We are so scared of saying something so afraid of dying by a bullet that we die everyday everywhere without even think about it. Am I angry? no I am just dead inside.....  

Rules are meant to be broken not hearts!!!

Everywhere every time there is a rule to follow, some are here for many ages still we follow them, asking 'why?' is prohibited, don't ask why what how just follow them blindly that's the way of living. Some rules are in the society as the good behavior, if you follow them you are good otherwise you are bad you are the current subject of social gossip. Its really sad cause in the early stages of human history human beings decided to live in groups to be safe from other vicious animals and to fight the unknown and untamed world, but now we are trapped in  society and sometime it is dangerous for our own safety. 

But it is much more sad for women in our society everyone knows it, talks about it but nothing is changing really, its more like a mentality that needs to change, specially in women herself. many girls just say that men of the society making all the rules they are enslaving us we are not free, but its all depends on us, how can we feel free!! its actually a mind game that has been played itself for many years, girls believe that they are meant o be shy, sophisticated soft, understanding, its the rules that the mothers taught us when we are young, a women when teach a future generation to obey behave or just be slave to a opposite sex, or just neglect a daughter in front of her own brother then what will those two going to learn? the girl going to accept her lesser importance and the boy going to act like the owner, its the basic when someone don't act like a species but act like a gender.

Rules are still in the minds of women in our society, living freely do as heart wants, be free is impossible for a woman in our society, cause they don't believe that they can  break the rules, the gender movement what is happening now all around the country first should concentrate  upon the mind set of a mother, a mother only can make a good man or a good woman or to be fair a good human being with all their own unique personality, own specialties, this discrimination will stand as long as parents won't treat their own as a human child, not as a girl or a boy but a new life in earth with lots of new possibilities and dreams their own dreams their own believes, its not that everyone think straight but what freedom really means? its a choice that one can make for themselves it can be mistake or a success  but they are free to make them to learn from them. All the rules around us are just making us weak. What is wrong in living a happy creative life just to live??? nothing wrong in it but still, right and wrong depends on mind some basic right and wrong is same for everyone accept for sociopaths and psychopaths, but otherwise it should be a free world now for everyone, nothing is here forever not were the dinosaurs not the ice ages, not Roman empire not anything everything is mortal so the same goes with the stupid rules of the society they are meant to be broken.....

Memoirs of Friends!!

Friendship is a beautiful relation, its like a refreshment among other relation we have, its free from any complication,formalities, its fun to be around a friend and do stupidest things without any judgment. Every one has some friends who witnessed craziest moments of ones life. Friends know everything about each-other against the world stand together, no matter what, we can stop talking to a friend but still feel the same way, being apart for many years but still enjoy the moments when we were together. I miss my friends all the time some of them now in different situation in different places with some I don't even talk now but still I miss them I miss the moments I spent with them those laughs long meaningless chitchats stupid crazy things we did I miss them all, and I know they miss those moments too, its hard when by misunderstanding or by situation friends just rip apart. 

Every friendship day I hangout with some of my friends have fun but still in the corners of my heart miss my lost friends whom I lost in time, I just wonder what is friendship actually the friends who helps you get out from any situation or the moments we all spent together having fun. Once with my tow best friends I went to a locally known haunted house after school, it was stupid because still daytime, the house was in the middle of our town still it was a adventure for three teenage girls of seven grade, but we found out that the house was a shelter of a crazy homeless guy, one of friend was so scared of crazy people that even more the ghosts, she ran screaming and the crazy person irritated by her also ran after her it was a laugh for me and other friend of mine, we just laughed like crazies then after a long time we start looking for our scared pal, she was standing in front of a shop totally out of breath and mad with us. 


Those days were fun we just did stuffs without thinking, we did planchette that means calling spirits from other plain, we were curious back then and in a empty room of our school we started our spirit calling venture also in the middle of the day in recess time, we locked the door from inside shut all the windows made circle around the table light a torch cause candle in the middle of school was hard to arrange I supplied the torch, first we call upon the historical figures but obviously nothing happened then my friend who ran scared before from that crazy dude called upon great poet Rabindra Nath Tagore and suddenly by wind one of the close window opened and the calendar with Rabindra Nath's picture fell from the wall, that was it; she was scared like hell again, just shot out of the room leaving two of us again for laughing. Its all was fun back then we did many crazy stuff but now I don't know where my scared little man friend is other one is grown up now married and act like a married lady all the time but we still laugh at those moments for hours. My whole school and college life is pact with many incidents and fun memories with my friends just like everyone of this planet, and every day I miss a little bit of those moments and keep on making new memories for the future....

I do believe in Fairies.. I do I do!!!!

Forgotten Feelings!!!

Its kinda funny that, when I was a little girl I did believe in little fairies, for me the little shine fireflies were angels or fairies in disguise, everything seemed magical back then. After reading Peter Pan I requested my father to make a little balcony in my room and he did a tiny balcony was built for me, but I never told my father that the reason of that little balcony was for Peter Pan and little fairies, though they never came; of course!! still there was hope always. With passing time, all waiting faded I forgot those feelings of magic and started to grow up, cause I don't live in Neverland I am a person of real world. That little balcony became my place for reading or just sitting or thinking, sometimes I used to hangout there with my friends. The shining Magical fireflies became ordinary fireflies nothing more than that.

Still its makes me smile to remember those feelings, when for me everything was so mysterious so magical, that little girl believed every fairy tale she read. I believed that the first smile of a baby makes a fairy, I was thrilled to think that I must have a fairy of my own, it was like a magical hope of finding something pure something sweet. But now it all forgotten feelings, but still now when a little baby smiles I just wonder for a brief moment what if!! then just suddenly forget that sense and move on to act like an adult. One day a kid asked me "do you believe in fairies?? are they real??" I just froze I knew the logic, cause I am a grown up; still I could not say no cause somewhere in my heart in forgotten feelings there's a little girl still exists, who fears if she say "no" her own fairy might die by lack of faith,so the words came out of my mouth was..."I do believe in fairies....'

close to my heart!!!

Reading is fun when the book is close to your heart, some books just so good that more you read more you like it, it happens to me all the time some novels and stories I just like to read over and over again. I personally love to read the novels of Bankim Chandra Chattopadhyay, when I was in school all the people used to say to me that the writing of Bankim Chandra is very hard, a different kind of Bengali not easy to enjoy, then it was obvious that I will read that as soon as possible but the language of his novels were surprisingly sweet and interesting, the description of a scene was just so perfect that any one could visualize the picture in front of them, I fell in love with the novel "Rajsingha" it was historical fiction and I loved it still do. Then my other favorite novel is "Kaler Mondira" by Sharadindu Bandyopadhyay, the story of lost prince Chitrok who brought up by Hun invader soldier and Joshodhara the huna princes whose father captured the kingdom many years age from Chitrok's parents, its a diplomatic love story also a historical fiction, just great to read.

I wonder that the most of the Hollywood movies are made on the base of a novel or good stories, but Bengali contemporary Bengali movies just not something I would like to watch some of them are fine but most of them is kinda boring and dumb, but that is my opinion, but there was a time when Bengali movies were good with good stories with real emotions and songs with good lyrics deep lyrics not just words, its not like we don't have good literature, Bengal is a land of literature with lots of good writers still no intellectual movies generally produces here, its a shame really. I wonder if someone can make a movie based on the novels of Bankim Chandra Chattopadhyay and Sharadindu Bandyopadhyay or novels of Sharat Chandra Chattopadhyay, but with their essence not by remix or updating with stupid ideas, cause great writers need to be pure , they don't need modification.

Another writer close to my heart is Jack London, I just can't stop reading his writings, so strong, practical and like a spear straight to your mind, first I read his 'White Fang' and totally adored it, a story of a wild wolf slowly becoming a man's best friend like the story of evolution of man dog relationship in a much shorter stage, then just opposite the story of a tame dog Buck becoming a wild wolf pack leader through his struggle with the world 'Call of The Wild', and many short stories like them makes you feel for sometime after reading, like his writing very much. His writings often reflect the idea of survival of the fittest, if someone want to mark the world then must be strong and with lots of fighting spirit. 

I like to read a lot its like a gateway for me to connect with other minds, when I can't travel reading is the only thing that keeps me going, stories imagination is a important part of my life I like to think and see something with my mind and books taught me that, the great writers and their great words inspire everyone who reads them, some parts of me just like this because of those books I read once.

“I would rather be ashes than dust! I would rather that my spark should burn out in a brilliant blaze than it should be stifled by dry-rot. I would rather be a superb meteor, every atom of me in magnificent glow, than a sleepy and permanent planet. The function of man is to live, not to exist. I shall not waste my days trying to prolong them. I shall use my time.”--- Jack London

“A bone to the dog is not charity. Charity is the bone shared with the dog, when you are just as hungry as the dog.”---- Jack London

Immortality!!

Immortality!!

Immortality sounds good, doesn't it?? its been every mortal man's fantasy through the ages, reflected in our literature, legends, folklore and everything as The Fountain of Youth, Vampires, The story of Dorian Gray all of them around the idea of immortality, its intriguing for us humans, cause we all know one day we all have to die but not dying ever makes the idea more interesting, even in the story of great and one of my all time favorite writer James Matthew Barrie, "Neverland" a place where no kid ever grows up, stays  young forever like Peter Pan. We all look upon our life as a ticking clock but we don't know when its going to stop, the fear of the unknowing makes all so gloomy and scary, but living forever is it really fun??? How can it be fun, its not in our nature to live in the same way, if nothing is changing we get bored, even same kind of TV programs makes us yawn then how come we can live happily forever, won't be bored by all the in the world?

If we were immortal then we don't had to compete for anything, don't run you have time don't hurry you are not going to die, so whats the point??? its more fun to live recklessly knowing that its a risk, it could cost my life that's the pure reason of adrenaline rush, the fear of unknown the risk the adventure of living in a uncertain world anything could happen good or bad but in every step a surprise just waiting in the corner. In the story of Dorian Gray the portrait reflected his long life's real ugliness the horror of living young and forever made a monster who doesn't care for the consequence of his action, and why in the world would he!! he is not going to die so the portrait just got worst by the passing moment. That is the true nature of Immortality, ugly, monstrous and hideous. So in the case of Vampires want to be immortal then first you have to die, a human life in exchange of immortality that is mainly the basic feeling of wanting something not worthwhile in our subconscious mind.

We all love the idea of living forever we just fear of dying just thinking of safety living in a quite safe life and by doing that we are killing every moment of adventure risk excitement from our own life, the fun of living is in a free spirited life its more interesting than Immortality, to live as mortal humanly possible......