Little bit of both!!

Little bit of both!!

What a person should be in life? A hero, good, kind hearted, wise, sensitive, brave, leader like, or a villain bad, wicked, schemer, brutal, sneaky like a dark opposite of the hero. What should one be? Obvious answer will be of course, a hero, even an antihero will say it, but in a good story or novel or in a movie we need some good and evil, side by side parallel in the platform for a solid climax, a dark character only can bring the hero into light, so little bad and good both needs to be present to make a strong storyline. Now what about the story of our lives? We are much more complex than any novel or story character, we have many layers, we don’t live in a black or white world, all we live in shades, different type of shades, nothing concrete, so why be just a hero, why not little bad sometimes, why not little bit of both.

There are many good people in this world, but I always witnessed that they are being used by different kind of people, in their back the kindness that they have shown was called as stupidity; they were fools to others only because they were nice, sweet and simple. They never understood the schemes and plots and the lies, because they were not sneaky enough to understand them, so at the end the good was foolishness for many people, so why be totally good and innocent and nice, why not play some games sometimes, why not treat people as they are, not as we are, little bit of plotting in answer of sneaky people, to understand the lying and manipulation we need to be little manipulative to do the right thing, keeping the peace, and to make someone calm sometime needs little manipulation, little scheming,  may be that is diplomacy in life. But it is hard for the person who is doing all this; it is hard to keep the balance in the amount of right and wrong or in good and evil.

Balance is everything, little misbalance can create chaos but keeping it together and being a little bad and good at the same time can make a strong story and a good climax, little bit of both is may be the answer for many problems.

The Raging Fire!!!

The Raging Fire

The discovery of fire or finding out the use of fire was a whole new doorway for human beings, then the fire arms and bombs and nuclear bomb stuffs are came rushing into our lives and now global warming and unstable balance of nature is just bonus of having a brilliant mind and an opposable thumb. But I am not talking about the fire outside I am just not liking the fact that our minds are in fire, the society the politics the whole world is on fire, and being that hot is no way can be cool. Killing a person is now no matter it’s just happens, a stupid finger on a trigger bam!! A man loses his life; a family can lose a loved one but who cares. May be human never cared about the life that much, our long bloody history shows that clearly, we just  pretend to be peaceful, give a chance or a weapon or a stick or a mouth in some case, viola! The human being strikes and peace just left the building.

The news channels and papers, logically the events are making it hard to find proper sophisticated words to describe the fire everywhere, just spreading and spreading, and body counts doesn't matter. It is like a traumatic event surrounding us, and by it more psychopaths, sociopaths and raging hatred growing, and the so needed peace and wisdom nowhere to be found. It is like a horror novel unveiling itself, slowly and without any happy ending. The plots are getting deeper, characters are getting dark to darker, the fire is emerging and we are scared or just not able to feel anything.

Too much bad experience can make us numb and it like a training center of horrible experiences, we just had to be born here then the training began. Being aware of the global and social situation is a must, we should not ignore our responsibility to do something that we supposed to do with sane mind, say right or wrong, do wise efforts to make this ticking time bomb a safe place to live again.

But day to day life is getting harder, and living in denial is far more better option than screaming and kicking in front row of this chaos, but some people are doing it, they are using their fire to create something, like our ancestors used the very first fire for making life easier (I hope they did only that!) safe and to make a home, but fire is raging, and people are dying every day without any valid reason, and we are just watching on the TV and reading on the papers and then going back to our same old ignorant life. But how long we are safe from the fire? The next dead person can easily be any one of us, then we just be a side story of a daily newspaper and the politicians will play the old blame game, and all will be ignored like every day, our whole life will be nothing but few black dots on a blank page.

Family tree!!!

Family tree!!!

“Family” is indeed the most important part of our life, getting along with family is hard, growing without family is painful, it can make someone stronger and happier also can ruin someone, but whatever the pros and cons, family is a huge part of all of our lives. Some has small family some has big, some functional some dysfunctional, some nice some rude some normal and some weird but all of us have a family, if we don’t, we try to find one our whole life, this is how much important this family thing is. Once a girl wanted to make a family tree for her family, but her family was little, her mom dad some close unties and uncle very little one, she wanted a bigger tree for her, she wanted to find the lost family members, the lost relations, connected by blood but parted by time, circumstances, misunderstandings, she believed that the connection is so powerful that can unite the messed up relations if just she finds them all.

But the bigger picture is not always rainbows and unicorns, the time, the bad circumstances was not the only thing that parted her family before, the people in those relationship did that, slowly unknowingly, by growing different and separated by different views, the relationship was there but the hearts were not combined, it was scattered, full of despair, hatred, greed and violence, she wished that it would have been better if she could have satisfied by her small tree, being naive is much better option than see all the nasty truth upfront, she thought she will belong she will feel connected to her lost family but she did not feel anything, there was nothing more than a totally strange feeling, that she did not like them. She was shocked, why? She did not feel the bond with them? They were biologically, genetically connected with them so where the love?

That was a transformation from them, she was being shallow before by wanting to make her family tree bigger, she should have only try to nourish what she had since her birth, she should have only think about the people who loved her understood her and it was her family, may be tiny but secure, lovable, maybe there was a reason behind why some of her relations were lost, it meant to be that way. The girl knew she had a small family but she was part of a huge forest  with different trees, and bushes, and huge old trees, she has many friends, the friends who loves her, supports her stand beside her in hard time, her little family was very strong and uncorrupted, that was the day she finally knew blood, genes or same biology does not matter, what matters is pure love, respect and the day to day life sharing alongside with each other, the people grow older grow different and choose different paths, and with time they don’t belong together, they becomes a part of a whole new different forest, and a little tree grows too, spread her branches and stands tall and dream of being an old huge tree someday, but by standing on the roots that she had forever beneath her, that is the connection which matters, and that is what families stands for, the roots of our life.

Sacrifice when just a hobby!!

Sacrifice when just a hobby!!

Sacrifice is a big and noble word indeed, but is it every time wise or even unselfish or even a right thing to do? I witness a family get ruined just because the head of the family sacrificed everything for other people and made his family suffer and after the all bad things still darn proud of it. So was it worthwhile, when your family was suffering and has been destroyed just you can feel proud about yourselves, and tell others that you did nothing but sacrifice every passing moment, so was it selfless or just a way to fuel the huge ego without any common sense and natural instinct inside? It is human issue and for that very much complicated how we should act towards others? Should we sacrifice for others and do nothing for ourselves is it a right thing to do? May be it is, a wise and noble man can sacrifice every bit of his life in sacrifice and for honor, but it is a right thing when you are not planning about it and not want to brag about all the work you have done, then only then it can be call a proper selfless act.

Intentionally acting like a wise man and noble man every moment trying to ruin own life just to feel good and proud latter while bragging about it is just sad way to waste ones’ life, and if that includes ruining own children’s life along the way is far less close to being virtuous. Human mind is a complex organ to begin with and different people have different kind of error in their brain and we are all very expert in twisting words and morality around our own desires, so planning and want to be noble get us nothing, but ultimate realm of destruction and sadness, but to some people sadness is luxury, finding an obstacle in life and sit in front of that and just complain about it is ultimate doing of many people, but not go around the obstacle, then name it sacrifice and blame everyone and feel sad for ever. This type of doing can depress a bunch of people, the middle of all man, then the family and friends all has to suffer with that person in some way.

But the saddest thing of all that person losing everything just to be proud but in the end cannot feel good because sacrifice was not his natural instinct, but an act that that person worked very hard to pretend, and lost all the pure happiness and nice moments along the way, a code to act good and noble is not the solution, not everyone can be self-sacrificing saint and they don’t have to, being yourselves being little selfish is not bad it is a nature of common man, naturally self-sacrificing people don’t even feel that they are sacrificing for anyone, they just do every day, without any proud or ego trips, just be happy to do good naturally without planning.

If someone cannot be happy by their own nature how can they spread happiness to others, one has to smile before trying to make other smile. “Sacrifice” is a big word; we all do some of that while living but if that is just a hobby to fuel the ego then it is a pretty big word just to indicate internal trouble for bunch of different people, in that case we just have to sacrifice the sacrificing nature and just act normally without planning a character just to live it as it is.

“Lost in time” – my entry to the Get Published contest’’

“Lost in time” – my entry to the Get Published contest’’

How this “love” works in life? No one knows the answer, or they do, in a completely different manner, the sparks, and the situation the feelings all varies man to man. occasionally the time and the actual recognition of that feelings happened in the most odd manner that other than that person no one can relate to that, but the bizarre circumstances does not make those love stories any less important.

“Lost in time” is a love story about two people, Akash a loner and a struggling writer, and a girl name Torsha, Torsha is name of a Bengali river. Far away from each other but still love happened, the feelings existed, but only problem was they belonged to different time, one in past one in present, they never met, never spoke to each other never shared a cup of coffee together, never walked in moonlight holding hands, but they shared the feelings they shared same ideas and understood each other better than anyone else. But they both had a fulfilling life with loved ones and their own family, they both were happy and both were somehow fell in love with each other, in love, age does not matter, creed, cast nationality does not matter, but in this story time did not matter either.

What Makes This Story ‘Real’: it may be a bizarre uncommon story but I first realized that, this was a real story when I was visiting my uncle’s house; one of the main characters was a neighbor of my uncle, for a very long time that person was known about as a grumpy old neighbor living all alone in that old age. Once visiting the house I realized the real story some from that individual and some from old diaries and letters. I was amazed and felt obligated to share that pure love story.

Extract: "Torsha’s parents first met on the banks of the river Torsha on a sunny bright winter day, so when their new born baby first smiled the name Torsha came rushing to their minds and flooded them with the amazing feeling of pure happiness, so the name bonded with the baby forever, it became the sign of her existence, a symbol of love. She knew love from the moment of her origin........"

Endnote: This is my entry for the HarperCollins–IndiBlogger Get Published contest, which is run with inputs from Yashodhara Lal and HarperCollins India.

Extreme stage of Narcissism or just beliefs?

Extreme stage of Narcissism or just beliefs?

If I was a strong believer then I could say that the god is trying to make me an atheist and with a good plan. In India as an Indian it is not very common to turn out to be a nonbeliever, the folk stories, legends, supernatural encounter stories are everywhere, every event has a peculiarly explanatory story behind it and reason don’t matter much in war with beliefs. Now the point I started before, that if I am a believer I should think that the Supreme Being is trying to make me a nonbeliever, and it is not very illogical point also. If the god has any resemblance with his greatest creation (ironically speaking) human kind than sometime he must feel very depress by all the exploitation and hustle is happening by his name, and he just want to be invisible and want to concentrate on other things.

Why should not? If someone created all of us or organized the big bang somehow should he still feel happy to see us like this? No one can think so, by the name of god killings are happening, we hate each other just for having different beliefs, different perspectives, and doing a lot of damage in the meantime to this creation and nature. May be it was better when all of us used to worship nature, trees, mountains and animals, by that we did not kill or destroy anything for fun. How selfish is that to imagine the supreme power in an exact shame of human beings, you don’t think it is a huge sign of extreme narcissism? The megalomaniac tendencies in human mind is working and making us to see us the man as a perfect reflection of supreme power, the god complex is growing and we believe us to be the creator rather than a little creation that we really are. The beliefs making us  self-centric and violent, other hand if we mix beliefs with science and then we act like master of everything, definitely the architect of new things and still on a power hungry trip to a down way street.

So it is possible that every time dismissing every blind belief in front of me by reason and logic the great almighty sending me a sign, to be a nonbeliever of supreme power or anything violent and dark, following logic and humanity and knowing that it is my faults that is I am suffering can find true nirvana from my ego, then may be just maybe I will not feel like I am doing charity if I give some food from my plate to animals that we are torturing everyday by just acting supreme. Being obligated is far more modest feeling than being the protector or the greatest animal on earth.

But all those things can come to my mind if I was a strong believer, but I am not, I am just a biological manifestation of this nature, part of this earth nothing more, I am lucky that I am able to think or feel, just not growing physically but growing mentally too, so if there is a creator that I picture as this universe because imagine that energy as a living thing with a head, tow hand, and two feet is not mentally stable idea, that is just an extreme case of narcissism.

Twist & turns of life !!

Twist & turns of life !!

Before meeting anyone new unknown we normally picture an image inside our heads, about that person with the facts in hand, like after hearing a name we think that person will be kind of like that or this, but the fun thing is after the actual encounter we get the original picture, sometime it is so funny to think about the assumption that we made before. Just like this life, one thing that we plan or assume that it is going to be that, or I will feel that, but in real something completely different happens, and that is what we need actually, something unexpected shocking new, it can be bad sometime horrific but still a new experience.

But sometime we get what we imagined and that feeling is not uplifting, because the exact result of our assumption never surprises us, and we, all human beings, believe or not love surprises, some of us claim to hate it, but still unconsciously need it. What we need is not always what we want. But this logic sounds extremely stupid most of the time in our life. Because in a little moment it is not natural for us to look into the big picture or find out the real longtime consequences, we just feel the moment if it is terrible then the logic before is completely out of line.

I have witnessed same mistake being done over and over again still hoping for a new result, not understanding the course happened before just crying and trying to hold up the same feeling, it hurts every time, still some people don’t look for a new question a new perspective, just like rat running in a fix circle. It is may be irritating for people watching the events happening and the person complaining, but the pain that the person is feeling is unparalleled, but no other except he or she help that to change.

Why doing the same thing over and over and hopping for a new result? Is it human nature? But no many people change, got wise with time and every experience do different things, but why some people don’t change? Are they stupid? Or just incapable of changing, why can’t they evolve mentally? But stay in a same psychological prison forever, may be they just never stop assuming and guessing the outcome, they just don’t get surprises from life or nor recognize it to change the course. It feels sad to witness such people turning and walking on a forever crossroad, not able to help them. May be there is no surprise in that; we cannot help anyone if they don’t need it. We can just walk on our road keep turning into new turns and get brand new scene and experience something unexpected.