Extreme stage of Narcissism or just beliefs?

Extreme stage of Narcissism or just beliefs?

If I was a strong believer then I could say that the god is trying to make me an atheist and with a good plan. In India as an Indian it is not very common to turn out to be a nonbeliever, the folk stories, legends, supernatural encounter stories are everywhere, every event has a peculiarly explanatory story behind it and reason don’t matter much in war with beliefs. Now the point I started before, that if I am a believer I should think that the Supreme Being is trying to make me a nonbeliever, and it is not very illogical point also. If the god has any resemblance with his greatest creation (ironically speaking) human kind than sometime he must feel very depress by all the exploitation and hustle is happening by his name, and he just want to be invisible and want to concentrate on other things.

Why should not? If someone created all of us or organized the big bang somehow should he still feel happy to see us like this? No one can think so, by the name of god killings are happening, we hate each other just for having different beliefs, different perspectives, and doing a lot of damage in the meantime to this creation and nature. May be it was better when all of us used to worship nature, trees, mountains and animals, by that we did not kill or destroy anything for fun. How selfish is that to imagine the supreme power in an exact shame of human beings, you don’t think it is a huge sign of extreme narcissism? The megalomaniac tendencies in human mind is working and making us to see us the man as a perfect reflection of supreme power, the god complex is growing and we believe us to be the creator rather than a little creation that we really are. The beliefs making us  self-centric and violent, other hand if we mix beliefs with science and then we act like master of everything, definitely the architect of new things and still on a power hungry trip to a down way street.

So it is possible that every time dismissing every blind belief in front of me by reason and logic the great almighty sending me a sign, to be a nonbeliever of supreme power or anything violent and dark, following logic and humanity and knowing that it is my faults that is I am suffering can find true nirvana from my ego, then may be just maybe I will not feel like I am doing charity if I give some food from my plate to animals that we are torturing everyday by just acting supreme. Being obligated is far more modest feeling than being the protector or the greatest animal on earth.

But all those things can come to my mind if I was a strong believer, but I am not, I am just a biological manifestation of this nature, part of this earth nothing more, I am lucky that I am able to think or feel, just not growing physically but growing mentally too, so if there is a creator that I picture as this universe because imagine that energy as a living thing with a head, tow hand, and two feet is not mentally stable idea, that is just an extreme case of narcissism.